Some of us get demanding and controlling, wanting someone else to They also are very them until you find a common ground that works for both. In the 700â1000 ms time window, the up-regulation effect in the LPP amplitude was negatively correlated with the up-regulation effect in negative affect, r(34) = -.40, p = .015, see Fig 8. In addition, it would be informative to compare the effects of having participants perform both up- and down-regulation in a testing session versus only one of the two. it is love when it's simply distraction and infatuation. When applicable, the degrees of freedom were corrected using the Greenhouse-Geisser correction. Each block started with an instruction word (âviewâ, âincreaseâ, âdecreaseâ) for 4 sec and consisted of 30 trials. Having determined that someone is attractive at first sight, an individual may become emotionally attached to that person and communicate their affection via a copulatory gaze, in which â¦ Participants perceived feelings of attachment as more controllable than feelings of infatuation and they felt more in control of the intensity of love feelings than of who they are in love with. The high prevalence of love combined with its significant positive and negative impact on individuals and society make it an important research topic. In Study 2, in contrast, we did assess the effectiveness of explicit love up- and down-regulation using the cognitive reappraisal strategy. Because the regulation effects were largest at electrodes Cz and/or Pz, LPP regulation effects were averaged across these two electrodes. For example, love is associated with positive emotions such as euphoria  and romantic relationships enhance happiness and life satisfaction . In addition, the pictures ensure high ecological validity, as the partner is typically encountered in a wide variety of contexts and with varying facial expressions. We think Because self-reports are the only way to assess subjective feelings , they are often used in behavioral and neuroimaging studies on emotion regulation as a way to assess regulation success (e.g., [49, 57, 73, 74]). For more information, please email@example.com. See Fig 3 for the infatuation, attachment, valence, and arousal ratings at the end of each block in the regulation task. These findings suggest that the more participants used the reappraisal strategy to regulate emotions in their daily life, the more they perceived love feelings as controllable. Yes This correlation was not inflated by the possibly outlying data point (i.e., up-regulation effect in negative affect = 1.5), because the correlation was even greater and more significant after exclusion of this data point, r(33) = -.44, p = .008. ERPs have been used before to study emotion regulation and to study romantic love, but not to study love regulation. As in Study 1, some of these strategies were the typical cognitive and behavioral emotion regulation strategies, such as reappraisal, distraction, situation selection, and suppression. It is also true that the less love you have, the more depression Positive and negative affect after each block, separately for both groups. Down-regulation instructions were to decrease love feelings by thinking about negative aspects of the partner (e.g., âShe is so lazyâ) or relationship (e.g., âWe often fightâ), or negative future scenarios (e.g., âWe wonât stay together foreverâ). To get love and keep love you Because this was only a pilot study with mostly female participants, we conducted a follow-up study (Study 2) to replicate and confirm these preliminary findings in a more gender-balanced sample. Recommended Citation In addition, responses on subsets of the 17 questions that measured perceived control over a certain aspect of love were averaged to obtain measures of perceived control over seven different aspects of love (love in general, infatuation, attachment, self, people in general, intensity of love, and object of love). Trial structure was: fixation cross for 900â1100 ms, picture for 3 sec, and blank screen for 2 sec. The direction of the effect of love regulation on emotion or affect may differ depending on the context, as indicated by the hypothesized opposite effects of love regulation on emotion/affect in the relationship and break-up groups. Discover a faster, simpler path to publishing in a high-quality journal. Data were segmented in epochs from 200 ms pre-stimulus until 3000 ms post-stimulus onset. This is an open access article distributed under the terms of the Creative Commons Attribution License, which permits unrestricted use, distribution, and reproduction in any medium, provided the original author and source are credited. Five paired sample t-tests were conducted to test for differences in perceived control between related aspects of love (i.e., love in general vs. infatuation, love in general vs. attachment, infatuation vs. attachment, self vs. people in general, and intensity vs. object of feelings). will be depressed, not only because you will not be connected enough but In the context of heartbreak, participants mostly used distraction, social support, and reappraisal. This was a love that you extended to all people, whether family members or distant strangers. Second, the other questionnaires and tasks used in both studies restricted the samples to participants who were in love (Study 1), who were in a romantic relationship, or who had recently experienced a romantic break-up (Study 2). Distraction entails performing a secondary task to reduce the intensity of emotions (e.g., playing a video game to forget about a bad incident at work) . See Table 4 for the mean perceived control over the seven different aspects of love. It may be that love down-regulation by focusing on negative aspects of the partner or the relationship or imagining negative future scenarios makes people feel bad because it involves negative thoughts. In two studies, we systematically examined preconceptions about, strategies for, and the feasibility of explicit regulation of love feelings. Essays and short articles about love and life, relationships, dating and friendship - the best examples of feature articles about love Love and Life. The second goal was to reveal which strategies people use when they try to up- and down-regulate their love feelings. The relationship and break-up groups did not differ in how long they had known their partner for, how long ago their love feelings had started, and the duration of their relationships. broad scope, and wide readership â a perfect fit for your research every time. getting and how you are being treated, read your partner's need. In the relationship group, the ERP was less positive for up- and down-regulation than passive viewing at Pz, both ps < .002. That is, a reduced affective and motivational significance of, and motivated attention to the partner pictures (as reflected by the LPP amplitude) may very well be accompanied by an increase in general negative affect that is not linked to the 3-sec presentation of a picture and will therefore not be reflected in the ERP (e.g., because the baseline correction removed the effect). This could for example be established by instructing participants to think about positive/negative aspects or future scenarios without mentioning that this is supposed to change the intensity of their love feelings. I just didn't know how to do and now I'll learn." No, Is the Subject Area "Event-related potentials" applicable to this article? Communication/honesty was mostly used for maintaining long-term relationships. Love up- and down-regulation have numerous applications, ranging from stabilizing long-term relationships including marriages, reducing heartbreak after romantic break-ups, ameliorating unwanted crushes and forbidden loves, and perhaps even coping with the death of a beloved. People who have just experienced a break-up, in contrast, would benefit from love down-regulation, because that could help them cope with the break-up. physically and emotionally. loved one's reality is as important as your own, and you need to be as ERP waveforms at Fz, Cz, and Pz for the four conditions, for each group separately. Per participant, a maximum of one bad electrode included in the analyses (see below) was corrected using spherical spline topographic interpolation. See Tables 1 and 2 for the regulation strategies reported. In short, several behavioral and cognitive strategies were used in the contexts of heartbreak and long-term relationships. When the Love is a universal emotion that has become the basis of marriage and family for many societ - ies, which researchers continue to explore. In this first empirical test of the feasibility of love regulation, we focused on the reappraisal strategy because it is considered effective in altering feeling intensity and beneficial for cognitive and social functioning . Six participants stated that love feelings would not decline if the relationship was good and/or that they would end the relationship if love feelings would decline. Trinity College, Photographs of Palace Buildings of Peking. Examples of other reappraisal strategies were thinking that time will heal, finding someone else to love, or focusing on positive aspects of oneself or oneâs life. We did not test the long-term effects of love regulation, but it might be that even though it may be cumbersome at this moment to use reappraisal to up-regulate love feelings, it may have beneficial long-term effects in the context of romantic relationships. One consequence is that when we hit real love we become upset and Positive affect after the two view blocks showed a main effect of Picture, F(1,38) = 27.2, p < .001, which was modulated by a significant Picture x Group interaction, F(1,38) = 21.7, p < .001. Even though self-reports gain a unique insight into what people experience, they also suffer from social desirability biases and demand characteristics [40, 41]. Although previous studies have shown that people can implicitly derogate the attractiveness of people other than the current partner [71, 72], the current investigation is unique because it reveals that people can deliberately down-regulate their love feelings for their (ex-)partner. Thus, partner pictures elicited positive and arousing feelings in the relationship group but not in break-up group, which confirms that the two groups differed in anticipated ways. depressed. e0161087. In addition, future studies could directly compare the effects of presentation of regulation instructions in a blocked versus an intermixed fashion, and the effects of letting participants choose between different regulation strategies versus instructing them to use one particular strategy. We present the concept of explicit love regulation, which we define as the use of behavioral and cognitive strategies to change the intensity of current feelings of romantic love. food, constantly stimulated by images of instant gratification. Actively dispute your internal messages of inadequacy. Participants were remunerated with course credit or â¬15. pop-culture ideal of love consists of unrealistic images created for Strategies such as expressing love feelings to the beloved, spending (quality) time with the beloved, and loving unconditionally/making compromises were mentioned by some participants. does this person really need for his/her own well-being? This Article is brought to you for free and open access by the Student Scholarship at Scholar Commons. Example of a Journal with Scholarly Articles The fourth love, and perhaps the most radical, was agape or selfless love. S1 Appendix. It is important to note that the ERP reflects brain activation elicited by events, which are the presentations of partner and neutral pictures in this case. These preconceptions of, and strategies for love regulation were replicated in two independent samples. The present study examined the association of love attitudes with the initiation, maintenance, and dissolution of relationships. Participants mostly used distraction and reappraisal when heartbroken. To summarize, up-regulation elicited a more positive ERP than passive viewing at midline centro-parietal electrodes between 300â400 ms. As expected, participants had the preconception that love is somewhat uncontrollable, as indicated by their scores on the series of questions assessing the perceived controllability of love feelings. Participants could use the information in the picture for inspiration. In the context of long-term relationships, communication/honesty was important for maintaining long-term relationships, while undertaking (new) activities with the beloved was used to prevent love feelings from declining (i.e., love up-regulation). The other strategies, such as reappraisal by thinking about the positive aspects of the situation, other ways of reappraising, avoidance, suppression (âmaking yourself strong (pretend) for the outside worldâ), eating/smoking, and expressing emotions were used least often when heartbroken. Rather than focus on what you are Because the LPP begins in the time range of the classic P300  and can last as long as the stimulus duration , the ERP was quantified by mean amplitude measures in four time windows based on previous work [47, 48, 56â58]: 300â400 ms, 400â700 ms, 700â1000 ms, 1000â3000 ms. For each time window, mean amplitudes measures at Fz, Cz, and Pz were subjected to two ANOVAs. As mentioned in the introduction, Study 2 also included a love regulation task to test the feasibility of love regulation. Beloved-related cues elicit love feelings , just like drug-related cues increase drug craving , so avoiding beloved-related cues may reduce âcravingâ for the beloved in the short term. Cognitive reappraisal involves reinterpreting the situation to change the way you feel (e.g., decreasing or increasing nervousness by reinterpreting an upcoming job interview as an opportunity to learn more about the company or as a once in a lifetime opportunity, respectively) . View Abstract. Communication/honesty was deemed important for maintaining long-term relationships, whereas undertaking (new) activities with the beloved, which is a situation selection strategy, was mostly used to prevent love feelings from declining. Attachment ratings also showed main effects of Picture, F(1,38) = 23.9, p < .001, and Group, F(1,38) = 5.6, p = .023. The break-up groups did tend to report lower relationship quality than the relationship group. Subsequently, participants answered four open questions about the use of behavioral and cognitive strategies in the contexts of heartbreak and long-term relationships. Participants felt more in control of feelings of attachment than of feelings of infatuation or love in general, both ps < .001. Scholarly Articles. Although it has been shown before that people idealize their beloved [32, 33] and that partner idealization is associated with greater relationship satisfaction , the current study is unique in showing that people are capable of up-regulating their love feelings deliberately and intentionally. Parts of the data are available on request. In the break-up group, none of the post hoc tests were significant. One reason why love would not be an emotion is that it elicits different emotions depending on the situation. Interesting psychology articles from around the net -- Great articles about psychology -- A list of the best articles on psychology. Louis, St. Louis, Missouri, United States of America, It is of course important to dissociate between the concept of love regulation and the well-established concept of emotion regulation. The neutral stimuli were 30 neutral pictures displaying humans from the International Affective Picture System (IAPS)  with neutral normative valence (M = 5.4, SD = 0.5) and low normative arousal (M = 3.5, SD = 0.5) ratings, see S1 Text. More research is needed to systematically test these and other factors to better understand the effects of regulation task characteristics on the LPP amplitude. Distraction was used more to feel better, while reappraisal by focusing on the negative aspects of the beloved/relationship was used more to decrease love feelings. The mean score on the 17 perceived control questions was 4.5 (SD = 1.4). Participants were not informed of the exact research purpose or hypothesis before testing, but they were instructed to increase or decrease their love feelings using cognitive reappraisal. Nevertheless, the questions about perceived control over love feelings have a couple of limitations. It was hypothesized that love up-regulation would increase feelings of infatuation and attachment, whereas love down-regulation would decrease feelings of infatuation and attachment in both groups. Depression keeps people so focused on Love is The Cause of Your Being: Incarnation and The Odyssey o f Boethius ... a model for loving those in despair that is founded on â¦ It has been accepted for inclusion in English by an authorized administrator of Scholar Commons. Although love up-regulation numerically increased feelings of infatuation, this effect was not statistically significant. As a Thus, love up-regulation using reappraisal may be more successful for up-regulating attachment than infatuation. Help someone else. 4. good or close you are, and if the relationship is going right those The relationship group experienced most negative affect after down-regulation, both ps < .008, whereas negative affect in the break-up group was not affected by instructed love regulation, all ps > .67. We thank Annemieke van Arum, Mandy van Dijk, Liesbeth Janssen, and Ginger Sassen for help with the data collection. Some participants reported avoiding beloved-related cues, such as pictures or conversations, when heartbroken, which is a situation selection strategy . For example, this finding suggests that after the dissolution of a long-term relationship, when levels of attachments are presumably higher than levels of infatuation , love regulation using reappraisal may be used to cope with the break-up by decreasing feelings of attachment. 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